this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
