Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize