Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Randomize
