i think my tv is drunk
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
