i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
