I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
