Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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