the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
