Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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