So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize