i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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