I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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