don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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