Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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