its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
