Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
