He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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