....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
