I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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