if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
