I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
