Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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