she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
