we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
