The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
