i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
