We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize