it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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