i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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