I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
