I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
