oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
