you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Randomize
