my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize