he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
