Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
