Nicole vs. Life
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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