Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Randomize
