Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize