I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Help. Why am I so naked?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
