so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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