"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
