During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize
