next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize