so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize