how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
