He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
