You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
