And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize
