big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
