you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize